by Lauren Shapiro*

Leave a seat between you and a stranger at the movie theater. Don’t hold eye contact for more than four or five seconds with any stranger… These are just two unwritten rules we know and assume others would know too. We typically do not put too much thought into these “rules,” but when one is broken it’s shocking. But who makes these rules?  In face-to-face communication, a lot of it has to do with personal distance and maintaining your space, while being respectful of the space of others.  

In computer mediated communication (CMC), specifically looking at social networking sites like Twitter and Facebook, netiquette is very much the “This is how we do things around here” context in which the culture of these communities operate. This is potentially why individuals are hesitant to join or participate once they do. The tech savvy twenty-something generation, who was in college during the evolution of Facebook, mastered the art of netiquette early on and practically wrote the book on what we do and don’t do on these sites.

In a world where physical distance is the least of your concerns, how do you ensure that your online behavior agrees with what is expected in online communities? Most non-verbal CMC is common sense and varies based on which “you” (e.g., the personal you or the business you) is represented in the online forum. Blurring the line between your personal and business life is becoming more commonplace. But it can also be very risky, so be aware. Understand that “friending” your boss on Facebook will give them access to your pictures, your friends, your status and your wall (unless, of course, you set your privacy settings). Even so, remaining mindful of your social networking circle is key. If you are Facebook friends with colleagues and bosses, posting “Work sucks!” is clearly a bad idea.

Some behaviors are not as clear cut. According to Jeremiah Owyang, who pens the Web Strategist blog, “You should only follow people who you trust, you think are interesting, or that you learn from.” He goes on to say, that in doing so, “It’s possible you’ll offend some people…” (Although, some may think it’s more offensive not to “friend” a person on Facebook).

Yet, it is ok to “take a risk and follow someone outside your immediate [Twitter] circle,” says Stowe Boyd, a social media consultant who writes the /message blog. (This is often frowned upon on Facebook).

Also, unselfish Tweeters tend to be viewed more positively than Tweeters who do not contribute to others’ posts. These and other interesting tips can be found  in the Computer World article, “Twitter Etiquette: Five Dos and Don’ts.”

Exploring social networking sites and understanding their culture will lead to a better comprehension of how to “fit in” on each site. What unwritten rules have you learned on social networking sites? What rules would you like to see adopted in the future? Which ones do you think can be done away with? Please share your thoughts with me and the readers of BurrellesLuce Fresh Ideas. 

*Bio: Soon after graduating from the Richard Stockton College of New Jersey, in 2006 with a B.A. in communication and a B.S. in business/marketing, I joined the BurrellesLuce client services team. In 2008, I completed my master’s degree in corporate and organizational communications and now work as the supervisor of BurrellesLuce Express client services. I am passionate about researching and understanding the role of email in shaping relationships from a client relation/service standpoint as well as how miscommunication occurs within email, which was the topic of my thesis. Through my posts on Fresh Ideas, I hope to educate and stimulate thoughtful discussions about corporate communications and client relations, further my own knowledge on this subject area, as well as continue to hone my skills as a communicator. Twitter: @_LaurenShapiro_ LinkedIn: laurenrshapiro Facebook: BurrellesLuce